Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Dear Upstairs Neighbor,

I know you don't notice it, or if you do, it is only a minor annoyance, one you probably hear a dozen times a day and think, "I really should oil that door hinge." Then you go on with your business. I understand, I'd probably ignore that squeaky hinge too, except for the effect it has on my, um ... personal life.

During the day I don't notice it. Probably has something to do with the fact that both you and I are at work. At night however ... it seems that you go to bed about an hour after I do. And sometimes I am not yet asleep but am engaging in ... shall we say adult play.

When your door squeaks and my husband and I are ... enjoying each other's company ... we suddenly stop and yelp "who's there" at our door -- even though we know our own door does not squeak. It's a Pavlovian reaction.

Even when we are simply sleeping, your door squeak has the same effect -- we think one of our children has escaped from their beds. This is not as damaging to our psyches when we are sleeping as when we are ... snuggling. But doesn't every parent fear the day their children manage to catch them ... um being close? It does, however, tend to jerk me out of that happy, half-asleep place that I tend to be in at that time of night.

So I ask nicely, please, please, please, for the sake of my sanity ... OIL YOUR BEDROOM DOOR!

And send my best to your kids,

Mama Squid

7 comments:

Meg said...

Ah, the joys of city living!

Penny said...

the garbage chute above us squeaks similarly and also has interrupted life a few times. and someone tosses out several bags of trash almost nightly at 3am.

i'm waiting for my nextdoor neighbor to realize that i can hear *EVERYTHING* in their bedroom (they're quieter now with two young children, tho we hear them yell at them).

all our neighbors exclaim surprise when they see us as we have "odd hours" and we are "very very quiet". *sigh*

Commando Daniels said...

Just send the squidlings up on a commando raid with a can of WD40 during the day while the neighbor is out. Just a quick squirt and dash back down the stairs. I'm sure if you can hear it, other neighbors do, too.

Isabelle aka Tricotine said...

HA HA! I love that post! What a creative and humoristic way to say it! :-)

I know what you are going through... Good luck!

Cookie said...

Oh my goodness...

Could you leave them a small can of WD-40 in a little bag on their doorknob? Clearly something must be done and that might be easier than sending the Squidlings up there to take care of it. ;^)

Mary said...

Funny post--but, what an annoying problem!

Maybe you should go upstairs with the WD40 and be semi-truthful. Explain that the squeaky door wakes you up and that you always get alarmed since you think it's one of your kids getting up because he/she is sick.

Ann said...

that post makes me want to say "Oil can" like the tin man in the Wizard of Oz. Perhaps a small can of oil with a big bow on it left on his doorstep?